Facing the hole

Facing the hole
The hunger that can't be filled
And yet still
I try
With drugs, alcohol, relationships
Looking outside for a quick fix
And even though I tell myself
And others
That I'm happy in myself
I'm bothered
Deep down inside
There's a sadness I try to hide
Anger pushed away
Let to deal with on another day
For the moment I'll just fly away
Go abroad
smoke one more
Have a drink
Try not to think
Or think happy thoughts
Tell the narrative I want to hear
Be the person who has no fear
With a cheeky smile, always dancing
Only cry when no-ones looking
But now that I've stopped smoking
Or drinking, I'm thinking
Nows the time to face this hole
Before I hook up with another soul
Be still
And look at that hunger that can't be filled

Or can it?
Can I fix it? Fill it?
Not with temporary pleasure
But with care for others
Gratitude for what I have
The good and the bad
Unconditional love for the world
Will nourish my soul
That's the teaching of yoga
Not just the physical asana
But the mental practice
That should lead to happiness
And let me lead a life of bliss
It's the path I'll try to follow
Turn away from the ego
And although the going might be slow
One day I hope to know
Contentment